A few weeks ago I was driving through the pasture and I noticed one of my cows off by herself. If she was nine months pregnant, I would assume she was about to have her calf. However, I knew she wasn’t pregnant so I began to wonder why she was alone. I started thinking about the parallels between a herd of animals and how people tend to follow the herd as well. I’m not a huge fan of Wikipedia, but found this quote while researching: “When an association of animals (or, by extension, people) is described as a herd, the implication is that the group tends to act together (for example, all moving in the same direction at a given time), but that this does not occur as a result of planning or coordination. Rather, each individual is choosing behavior that corresponds to that of the majority of other members, possibly through imitation or possibly because all are responding to the same external circumstances.”
Many people choose the behavior of the majority through imitation and unconsciously responding to common external influences. I recently had lunch with Reese Bricken (founder and leader of Adventures of the Heart) and a statement he made has continued to resonate in my head – “If you want to end up like everybody else, just live like them.” Interpret this however you want…divorced, broke, depressed, obese, overwhelmed, stressed, narcissistic, etc. The reality is I only know a handful of people that have a life worth imitating and if truth be known, I may not even want to be like them. Several years ago, I decided I didn’t want to be like everyone else and that I was going to live life differently. I began to question everything that I once just accepted as the norm or just “what we do.” For those that know us well, you know how we are unapologetically different and the decisions we have made that separate us from the herd. For those that don’t know my family, you may not think we are that different from everyone else. We don’t hide anything, and will gladly share our lifestyle with others, but we also do not feel it is our job to convince everyone to make the choices we have made.
I am intentionally not sharing those things here because I believe you have to come to these conclusions on your own. However, I challenge you to examine all areas of your life and ask yourself, “if I don’t want to end up like everyone else in the future, how do I need to live my life differently today?” Challenge your personal “status quo” and your alignment with herds or groups. As an example, I know many people that have compromised their values and core beliefs because of their chosen political party. I’m not suggesting you become a “contrarian” in all things, but just take the time to think for yourself and know “why” you do “what” you do. If you are considering leaving the herd because you see and interpret things differently than those around you, watch this youtube video of Plato’s Allegory of the Cave and know you are not alone.
It has been too long since I have thought about Plato’s Allegory of the Cave. I have always had a deep appreciation for the analogy and am glad a reminder is presented through your story of living outside of the herd.