Last night was a very special night. Louci and I attended the annual Father-Daughter Purity Ball in Paulding County. It was a wonderful time of games, dancing, dinner and commitment. A few weeks ago I told Louci that I wanted to give her a promise ring this year at the purity ball. The whole process was very intentional. We went to a custom jewelry maker and designed her ring together. I wanted it to be special, one-of-a-kind, like her. For several weeks we talked about the ring and how special this night was going to be. I wanted her to hear me telling other adults about the remarkable evening we were planning. Our anticipation continued to build until the moment I dropped down on one knee and presented the ring. I reminded her of our agreement that she will trust me with her heart and allow me to approve any young man that desires to have more than a friendship with her. She acknowledged our agreement, told me how much she loved the ring, I gave her a kiss on the cheek, we hugged and then we enjoyed the rest of the evening.
We live in a world today where everything is relative. Unfortunately, there are no “absolutes” anymore for the majority of Americans. Our moral standards are dwindling and the degradation of our culture truly worries me. I could continue this rant for days, but instead I plan to be intentional with family and those I lead. There are really only two ways things happen, intentional or unintentional, on purpose or by accident. Intentionality is purposely influencing the outcome of a situation. However, in many cases, we have to live with the unintended consequences of being unintentional.
As parents or leaders, its your choice to be intentional to influence the outcome or unintentional and live with the unintended consequences.
One of my favorite quotes is from my friend and mentor Tim Elmore, “Build bridges of relationships that can bear the weight of truth.” I can’t guarantee the outcome of any situation, but I can build a relationship with that person that will allow me to speak truth into their lives at crucial moments. Relationship building takes time and the sooner you start the better, especially with children. With Louci, I choose to give her something now rather than take something away in the future. Don’t read past that too fast…at this age (12 years old next month), asking my daughter to remain pure and save herself for marriage is a gift…instead of waiting until she is 16 and target practicing with my AR-15 in the yard as her date pulls up (I may still do that too!). Being intentional is being purposeful and proactive, not being perfect. I am far from perfect but I know a day will come when I will wonder if I did everything I could for the people in my life and I know I can at least say I was intentional!
“Build bridges of relationships that can bear the weight of truth.” Now that is a profound quotable quote. Thank you.